martha wainwright

martha wainwright: ‘bloody motherfucking arsehole’

Betraying the Patriarchy

I have been posting some short poems I have written. These particular poems are about love, but they are reflective of the violence of love, the gendered violence of love within patriarchal family structures. It occured to me that as I did this I felt that I was betraying someone or something. I felt a tremendous guilt, as if it was unfair to be saying ‘fuck you’ to the perpetrator of the violence, who in this instance is my father.

I feel guilt in betraying the patriarchal figure of my life. So I reflect on this and begin to think through the structural which extends beyond my personal situation, informing it but exceeding it. It is in thinking the larger system of what bell hooks calls “white supremacist capitalist patriarchy” that I am able to release my guilt, or convert that guilty energy into a creative force for positive change.

I am learning to betray the patriarchy. I am learning how to fuck it up by telling its truths. There is always context to violence, the violence is always complicated. It is this that I want to get to, to unpick and understand, maybe even to forgive. I think that requires showing its full force, without pulling any punches.

-dredgirl

another poem…

today i listened to the air

and the sky was clear

blue

more blue than i can ever recall

even though

inside the home

behind the curtains

contained by the fibro walls

my mother’s crying

shook me

and the air vibrated with her wailing

and my tears fell without a sound

and my heart quietly folded